Show Notes
In this episode of Peaceable and Kind, Derek Vreeland interviews Dieula Previllon, author of the book Does God See Me? How God Meets Us in the Center of Our Trauma Healing Journey. Dieula shares her personal story of trauma and healing, and discusses the importance of recognizing and addressing trauma in our lives. God sees and cares for us in our pain, and that healing is possible through God’s love and grace. This conversation also touches on the challenges of assimilation for immigrants, the power of storytelling, and the need for men to engage with their own pain and seek healing. The conversation explores the impact of trauma on individuals and the need for self-care and inner peace in order to be peacemakers in the world.
Book mentioned in this episode:
Does God See Me? How God Meets Us in the Center of Our Trauma Healing Journeyby Dieula Previlon
Scripture verses mentioned in this episode:
Genesis 16:7-14
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Transcript
Narrator: Welcome to Peaceable and Kind, the podcast where we explore the transformation. Each week your host, Derek Vreeland, will delve into the stories, scriptures, and practical steps that help us embody these essential Christian virtues.
Derek Vreeland: Welcome back to another episode of Peaceable and Kind. We have a special guest with us today. And I am so looking forward to this conversation. But before we jump into that conversation, Let me say thank you for listening and commenting and subscribing to this podcast. I really, really appreciate it. And if you have found any value in these episodes, would you consider writing a review on Apple Podcast? That helps us grow the channel. If you know people who would appreciate good, helpful, encouraging Christian content like this. Would you make a recommendation? Would you would you share maybe this episode? If you like this episode, share that with someone who you know would like it. And also you can subscribe to my Substack for more content. My Substack is Derekbreland. substack. com There is a link in the show notes of this episode. So click that link. That’s probably the easiest way to get to my Substack because that way you don’t have to figure out how to spell my name correctly. And speaking of spelling names correctly, I am happy to be joined today by my friend and new author. Gerla Prevalon. She has a new book out. Does God See Me? How God Meets Us in the Center of Our Trauma Healing Journey Uh Jirla is the founder and executive director of Elevate Her International Ministries. Her professional career in counseling, pastoring, and international ministry. Spans over 20 years. Jurla was born in Haiti, and she is the fourth daughter in a family of eight. And I’m ready to get into this conversation. Gerla, welcome to Peaceable and Kind.
Dieula Previlon: Thank you so much for having me. I’m excited. I’m excited to have this conversation with you today.
Derek Vreeland: And this is your first book, correct?
Dieula Previlon: Yes, this is my first book. I’ve written in blogs and done different things. I have a substack, all of that, but this is my very first baby
Derek Vreeland: Yeah, and it it isn’t it like and so you you’re mom of three boys, is that correct?
Dieula Previlon: I am I’m the mother of three young adult men.
Derek Vreeland: Okay Well yeah, it’s writing a book is it’s a little bit like having a baby, isn’t it?
Dieula Previlon: It really is. It really is.
Derek Vreeland: So what’s been the experience of Fine because you know, writing is such an interesting um experiment because you you’re just working alone and maybe you’re you know uh sending out manuscript and getting feedback, but it’s a really kind of private personal sort of experiment like is this coming together but then you launch it out into the world what’s that experience been like with your book now out in the world
Dieula Previlon: Yeah, that’s an um interesting question because I’ve felt that. I haven’t been able to talk to anyone about it because, you know, w while you’re doing the writing, you’re very protective of the manuscript and of how you vr write and how you come across and you’re just working with your editors. And then it’s launched into the world. And you’re like, okay, brace for it, brace, brace yourself, brace yourself. So you can hear all of the reviews and feedback and all of that. So it’s been a bit of uh me uh running under my covers and just waiting in fear of what the people would think. Because I really wanted women like myself to love it, you know, and to be and not just love it, you know, to to know, to praise me and all of that, to really find it as a resource. You know, because the content of the book has been a resource for me and I want it to be a resource for others that are reading it.
Derek Vreeland: And I noticed that that I really appreciated that in each chapter there’s reflection questions, and then you have this uh these practices like from head to body. Um that I found really helpful because it’s not just theoretical, but there’s some practices. But before we jump too too far into the resources, You have to tell me the story about having the cover of your book in Times Square. I saw that on the That was fantastic. How did that come about?
Dieula Previlon: So exciting. That was so exciting. So my dad was a cab driver in New York. And one of my dreams had always been where my dad was cab driving, and my dad um passed away 11 years ago, 12 years ago. And so one of my dreams was always to have my book on a billboard in Times Square. And so I shared this little vision with my husband. I shared it with my business coach and they’re all very excited and I’m scared because I’m like, this will never happen. You know, I mean, it’s time square. This will never happen. And so my husband’s making phone calls. He’s calling all over the place to try to figure out, you know, how to do it I mean he some people quoted him like thousands of dollars to get on there. And I’m like, I don’t have that kind of money. We do not I’m that kind of money. I’m an author. You know authors don’t make that much money.
Derek Vreeland: That’s true.
Dieula Previlon: And out of nowhere he found um a contact that was able to do it and my niece was the one that designed the little video they asked for and lo and behold just like that My book was on a billboard in Times Square.
Derek Vreeland: Yeah, it was wild. Amazing. Amazing. Um, I re I realize that a lot of your work has been with Helping women process uh through trauma. And you tell so many stories in the book, uh particularly your own stories, and that’s what I found very compelling. Because of course, you know, the book is sort of rooted in the Hagar story, right? Hagar is the one who calls God Elroy, the God who sees. But you are filtering this through your own story. And I found that compelling. So why don’t you tell us a little bit of your story? Um and as you feel comfortable, some of the the trauma you experienced early on.
Dieula Previlon: Yeah, you know, one of the things that I think my parents did very early on was to change my name. And the name that most people have issues with here in America, because I was born in Haiti. You know, the name Jirla means God is here or God is present. And the reason they changed my name, my real name or my first name was the M. that’s in um in the title of the well on the cover of the book and my that was the name I was giving M Magalie And so part of the story that my parents um have been telling me all throughout my life was that I almost died. you know, um, at birth and they had a coffin made out for me and all of these things. And you know, as you share these stories, Haitians and people living in developing countries would understand, you know, why that would be the case, you know, a child almost dying in Haiti, because it is the mortality rate of children being born in Haiti is it’s it’s high. You know, children dying in Haiti is high. Um and for the mothers giving birth, you know, there’s several stories in our a family of mothers who have died. I have a cousin whose mother passed while giving her birth So all of that, all of those stories are traumatic. So I was born in that. Wow. I was born in that, and that’s why my parents changed my name to um jurla, which means God is here. If God wasn’t present, then I would not have been here. So for as long as I know, you know, my life has been basically dealing with trauma and finding ways to heal from trauma. So I I tell folks that it’s it’s it’s inevitable. It was inevitable that I would be at this point of helping people heal from trauma. of really having the language of trauma because that was all of my life. And even moving to the US, um there was a a I don’t think people realize how How much trauma refugees and immigrants and you know asylum seekers, all of these people face As we’re leaving our homeland to come here for a better life, you know? So trauma has always been something I knew, and I believe God in his grace and mercy has called me into the work because I know the work. Not just from a professional standpoint, but but from experiential experiences that I’ve had throughout my life that’s made me somewhat of an expert of the trauma healing journey. That’s one of the things I’m like. I I I I don’t want to tell people I’m an expert because I’ve experienced it, but part of it is true, you know When you’ve lived with trauma, you become um an expert at seeing it and knowing about it
Derek Vreeland: To me, it really lends the credibility, I think, to the resources you’ve created in this book because this is not just theory for you. This you have walked this out because so your parents um immigrated or moved to the U. S. when you were a child. Was it like 10 years? I can’t remember exactly.
Dieula Previlon: What was the time frame? Yes, I I was about um I was a baby when they left and there was a ten year span where we did not see each other.
Derek Vreeland: Wow. Mm-hmm. So they were already in the the States for for ten years, and so just that separation creates some kind of trauma in childhood. And so then you moved to the US and what was that experience like? Oh my gosh.
Dieula Previlon: That I mean, to be a child, uh, you know, tw about ten, twelve years old, you know, to be a child and start school in the US as a teenager. Um d you know, the m middle school is already like hell for kids living here in America.
Guest: Yes.
Dieula Previlon: It’s it’s hard. Parents who had children in middle school know that Middle school has got to be the hardest times in a youngster’s life. And imagine adding, not knowing the language. Not knowing the climate, not knowing the culture, not having any friends, feeling isolated and lonely. So it was it was extremely traumatic. It was an a tr extremely traumatic experience. And now looking back now at those experiences and growing up biculturally because at home I was very much taught to be Haitian and not to uh assimilate, you know, because there’s that other pressure You know, at home they’re telling you don’t assimilate and you’re like, if I don’t assimilate, I will die, mom. I will die. I need to learn the language, I need to learn the culture so I can survive. I must assimilate. And at home, they’re like, don’t. And so you had all of these pressures and all of these things. And I think, you know, God in God’s grace and mercy just just allowed so many people along the way to help me, to see me, to just be angels for me on the path of of growing up here in America. We I had my um A school aide, for example, the lunch aide that w that would be outside that felt safe for me, you know, and I don’t think she she meant to be my angelic presence, but she was, you know, she was that safe person that made me feel comforted and protected in those times. But yeah, it was it was traumatic. Probably the top for me.
Derek Vreeland: Yeah, I I I I cannot even imagine. I grew up in the Midwest in a predominantly white uh suburban kind of neighborhood, went to predominantly white school, and I I have no I Middle school was hard enough for me. I can’t even imagine with all the pressures and barriers that you had to break through, how difficult that was. But it’s it’s great though to recognize the grace of God in the ordinary and the grace of God in these these people like uh those working in the lunchroom.
Dieula Previlon: Yes.
Derek Vreeland: So the the title again, Does God See Me? rooted in the Hagar story. I want to read just a little bit from from your book. There’s so much in here that I I just I resonated with and There’s so much in here that got me thinking. Um, but you’re it this is in chapter two and you’re you’re talking about uh the Hagar story. And um you say uh you write on page twenty-nine, Hagar’s name for God tells me that he sees all of us in our afflictions, especially those who feel as if they’re invisible and have no voice. For those crossing a dangerous border in search of life, God sees you. For those who’ve dealt with unspeakable traumas, God sees you. For those who’ve dealt with loss after loss, God sees you. And you go on to list people in different places of vulnerability. communicating that God sees you. I I I sensed a little bit of a preacher coming out in that section. But how encouraging because this this is the gospel message that God sees us that God is with us, God has come to rescue us.
Dieula Previlon: Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah, one of the you know the things that God has called me to is as a preacher and I and I wanted to connect with my audience through um almost like a conversation. When I preach, I feel like I’m talking to someone. We’re engaging, you know, in many black traditions when you’re preaching, it’s a conversation. The audience is is connecting back, they’re responding. So as I was writing the book, I want I visualized an audience in front of me as if I’m preaching and that audience is resonating. And so I had to humanize the people I was talking to. I had to visually see them so that it can resonate as I I was sharing. Yeah, I wanted to touch the different people that I’ve met throughout my journey who have gone through pain and suffering because I’m all I as a therapist I meet a lot of people. And as a nonprofit developer, I meet a lot of people around the world with just painful, painful stories. And I wanted to basically nod to them and say I see you, God sees you. Oh, and God knows your story.
Derek Vreeland: So powerful. So powerful. And you you address the sisters, and as I mentioned earlier, I know your work is working with women. But I want to say as a man reading this book, so much of it resonated with me. And I think it’s because this book came into my life at at the perfect time. And I think God sometimes does that. Like a book comes to you at just the right time because after 25 years of pastoral ministry I have just started a new relationship with a therapist. And so I was beginning to process some things just internally, personally. childhood, my past, right when this book came. So even if you may have imagined that you’re primarily speaking to your sisters, you’re speaking to your brothers too.
Dieula Previlon: And you know what I love about that? Because that’s the point. Because a book written for w women is also a book written for men and people that are in need. Because I I think everyone can learn from women’s stories. Yes. Right? From women’s pain. Yes. And it can resonate because what what this book is, it’s uh it’s a book that humanizes all pain.
Derek Vreeland: Yes.
Dieula Previlon: You know, all of our pain. So when we’re talking about pain, it’s not just women’s pain, but our pain. There’s a collective pain that happens. There’s a col there’s an um interconnectedness that happens when we’re suffering, that I can understand my brother in pain, and I can also understand my sister in pain. So yes, I love that it resonated for you. And I’ve heard that all over You know, I had one of the my brothers, um, he’s from China and he read the book and he said, I was surprised by how much your book resonated with me. And I’m like, yes, that’s exactly right, because pain connects us. in a way that also joy connects us and hope connects us.
Derek Vreeland: Yes, yes. And I I think for a lot of men and just from my own perspective, sort of in white evangelical type circles, you know, there is still these stereotypes that to be a man is to be tough and to be somewhat disconnected from negative emotions and And I I I think I had so much of that baggage in my in my past. It it really creates a lot of pride and uh and a lot of barriers. Um and and for me, I you you describe at one point in the book um as you’re going through a season of trauma how you you built a wall to keep God out.
Guest: Yeah.
Derek Vreeland: And I think that’s a real common experience. And this was the section of the book that I text you about. This is the section that I I wrote all these notes because things you were saying were just speaking to right where I was at in my life And I recognize that for me, I know it’s common just pastorally, I know it’s very common when people are going through painful experiences, traumatic experiences to wall God out. But for me, I think what I had done is I had walled the therapist out. Where I had said to people, it’s okay to have Jesus in a therapist too. I’d always encourage that. But me personally I had not gone through that journey until recently, and then your your book comes along. And the other realization I had, because I was wrestling with your story. in how people were encouraging you at this point in your life, reach out to God, but you had built this wall. And I was thinking, I don’t, I don’t do that. I just do the I kind of do the opposite. In my most painful moments, I reach out to God. But then what I caught myself doing was comparing my suffering to your suffering. And that doesn’t help at all.
Dieula Previlon: No, it doesn’t. No.
Derek Vreeland: Because your story is different than mine. And how you respond is different than me.
Dieula Previlon: Exactly, exactly. You know, and and one because doing the whole uh Olympics of who hurts more or who has More pain is not helpful for the healing journey because what it does is that it creates shame And then it prolongs our healing journey because we think that God couldn’t possibly care about this little thing, you know, that I have, where there’s so much greater pain around the world. God cares about all of them. Yeah. You know, and God wants us to have a loving and and and and you know and and feel whole in our being, in as we’re walking, as we’re uh being preachers or you know, nonprofit developers, God wants to for us to bring our whole selves in these places. And whatever it is that’s causing the hurt and the pain, God wants to touch it and God wants to heal us and give us freedom. So we can be our full selves in these roles and in these spaces. And not just for to be to to be our whole selves in roles. To be our wholesales, period.
Derek Vreeland: Yes.
Dieula Previlon: You know? Period. Not just for the sake of of work or for the sake of doing things. But just period in the being.
Derek Vreeland: Right. Because God God sees us where we are, and God wants us to be whole and healed. Not just so that God can use us. Certainly God has a mission and a calling for each of us, but God wants us whole simply because God loves us, God sees us, and God wants us to be our best selves.
Dieula Previlon: Absolutely. Absolutely.
Derek Vreeland: Well, I I so appreciate how this book came into my life at this time where I was able to really break down some walls. Because I think for me, part of the wall that also built up is I didn’t personally need a therapist because I was comparing myself to other people. Like I I I grew up in this middle class environment where generally things were good. Things were happening internally that were traumatic for me. I would not have labeled it then.
Guest: Yeah.
Derek Vreeland: So I kind of just shoved all of that down. And then um in in reading this book and working with my therapist, I recognized, no, I I need to acknowledge Those painful, traumatic events in my life, not compare it to anyone else, but process it so that I can be healed
Dieula Previlon: Absolutely. Absolutely. You know, and I think what what happens when we’re comparing, you know, pain in our lives, we diminish. our human experiences. We diminish our human experiences. So we show up fully, however big and however um little you know the because there is a thing as big T trauma and little T trauma.
Guest: Sure.
Dieula Previlon: You know? And and they’re they’re all painful experiences. What we found is that There are people that experience multiple, multiple little T trauma. And when that big T trauma comes, it just completely flatlines you. Right? Because you’ve been dealing with so many little things over the course of life. And then when this thing happens, you’re like, why does this thing flatline me so much I don’t have that the resiliency I need to survive this thing because you’ve been dealing with so many other painful things that you looked at as little But they weren’t so little in in the grand scheme of things.
Derek Vreeland: Well there’s a cumulative effect, right? Even those little T traumas, they they kinda pile up and then the big T trauma comes like you said, and then it’s Yeah, then it’s really really bad.
Dieula Previlon: There’s a weariness that happens to the soul, you know, with these little tea traumas.
Derek Vreeland: Yeah Yeah. So it’s good to recognize those and and not compare your experience to other people’s experience or your pain to other people’s pain. I’m convinced that Jesus is calling us To fill the world with peace and kindness. That’s kind of the basis of this entire podcast. I’m just trying to promote, you know, Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount, right? In the Beatitudes. Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God, daughters and sons, making peace in God’s world. And I think the healing over trauma part is key because I don’t think we can be peacemakers in the world until we have real peace inside.
Dieula Previlon: That’s right. That’s right. Yeah.
Derek Vreeland: And so God God sees us and God wants us at peace and healed and well for the sake of our own soul. But there is also uh a mission because for God so loved the world that he sent his only son, God wants to rescue us, but then we are working with God and bringing peace and kindness into the world. And so I think your book is a fantastic resource. for people to find healing over trauma. So I want to say congratulations again on the book.
Dieula Previlon: Thank you, thank you.
Derek Vreeland: Um and thanks for joining me for this conversation. It wasn’t long enough. If this podcast survives, uh maybe we can have another conversation. But Gerwa, thank you so much for your work, for your ministry, for your writing, and for the conversation today. I appreciate it.
Dieula Previlon: Thank you for having me. Appreciate it.
Guest: Well, that’s all that we have for today. Thank you so much for listening to this episode. Go in peace and be kind.
This transcript was generated with AI and may contain errors.